Key Learning Points: The Wolf Parable is story about the inner conflicts we face in how we approach others and our personal agency in choosing and shaping how we approach the world.
The Wolf Parable
The wolf parable is a story that bounces around the internet and which often appears in the world of personal and leadership development.
The story goes as follows:
An old man is teaching his grandson about life. He says to the boy:
“There is a fight is going on inside me. It is a terrible fight between two wolves.
One wolf is evil – it is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.”
He continues,
“The other wolf is good – it is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.
The same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather,
“Which wolf will win?”
The old man smiles and replies,
“The one you feed.”
What can we take from the parable?
This parable highlights the dual nature of our personal inclinations and the power of personal choice in determining our paths in life.
In this version of the parable the “evil” wolf represents negative emotions and mindsets that lead to discord, while the “good” wolf embodies positive mindsets and aspects of human nature that, when embodied, lead to harmony and fulfilment.
The core message that is often raised in line with this parable is basically that we can choose our attitude. If we adopt a positive mindset, we’ll yield positive outcomes. However, if we adopt a negative mindset, we’ll yield negative outcomes.
There is another possible interpretation / build on the story though. The other take away is that it is important to keep both wolves fed a little because if we starve the “evil” wolf, it will become desperate and be lurking in all our walks of life.
Regardless of which version of the parable is most relevant or helpful for people, the core underlying message remains that self-awareness, choice and intentionality play a key role in our successful navigation of the world.
Where does it come from?
The parable is often attributed to Native American culture, specifically the Cherokee.
There do seem to be conflicting stories of exactly where it has come from, as well as what specifically the messages associated with it might be, so it’s important to acknowledge that it could be being misattributed and interpreted.
Learning More
A good starting point for learning more is Stephen Covey’s “See, do, get” model, which is very aligned to this parable.
You might also enjoy exploring personal values. And when it comes to relationship building and inter-personal connections, we think SCARF is a helpful tool, as is learning about models of trust.
Our View
We find this a helpful parable from a personal development and coaching perspective. We typically use it when exploring how people connect with each other, build relationships and work together.
Our standard approach to using something like this is to share it with an individual or a group, then to ask them what they take from it, or what it means to them.
Overall, we find it a helpful tool, and it’s always interesting to hear what people do take from it. It is clearly a rather simple tool or blunt instrument, so some people find it frustrating. But as long as you acknowledge this and treat it as a provocation more than anything else, it’s a lovely conversation starter.
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Sources and Feedback
We first came across this in – Bregman, Rutger. 2020. Humankind. London, England: Bloomsbury Publishing PLC.
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